Improve Performance Using Empathy

Happy New Year!

2021 has (finally) arrived, with all that’s wrapped up in it.

If you’re like me, the transition from 2020 to 2021 was pretty uneventful and certainly different this year.  

While 2020 unquestionably was a year like no other, pretty horrible in many ways, very emotional in other ways, and yet there were many gifts that came our way, individually and collectively speaking.

I feel that 2021 is more about enhancing and sustaining what we’ve learned in 2020, rather than scratching it off our memories forever.

For me, 2021 means:

·      solidifying the values that have driven me through 2020

·      continuing with self-care and strengthening the body-mind-soul connection

·      maintaining my strong and deep relationships and build new ones

·      intentionally and mindfully making decisions that are good for me AND good for others

As we start this year, I would like to focus on improving performance through empathy.  Empathy was a key component of 2020, as we all had to empathize with others about their work situations, their health and families.  My focus today is on improving performance through empathy with yourself.

Let me paint a picture for you. Imagine that you have this 10-year-old kid that lives with you.  This kid is participating in a weeklong sports competition at school. At the end of the first day the kid comes home a little banged up and injured, saying the competition didn’t go very well.  In disappointment and frustration, you throw this kid down to the floor punching and kicking to teach this kid a lesson and push the kid to perform better the next day. I know this is a very disturbing image, but this is in a way what you are constantly doing to yourself!  That is what your inner critic/ inner judge/ inner Saboteurs are constantly doing to you, beating you up so you do better.  

The truth is the opposite.  

Beating yourself up drains you of vital mental and emotional energy which you could have focused on improving yourself and performing even better.  Pulling yourself with positive energy works much better in the long run, than pushing yourself with negative energy.  It’s much more fun along the way too!  Your peak performance comes through your sage not your saboteurs.  Instead of the brutality of your saboteurs, you want to bring the empathy and compassion of your sage.  Receive this kid with loving arms , put a bandage on the wounds, give the kid some warm bread and soup, build the kid up for perhaps some better performance the next day.  

Protect the kid from the brutality of your inner critic, treat that kid, yourself, with compassion especially when you find yourself not performing at your ideal level. You will see that this will help you perform better over time.

Parts of this newsletter is inspired by the Sage and Saboteurs concepts of Positive Intelligence, or PQ, by Shirzad Chamine.